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Animal House Rules

If you’re like me, the little stars living in your home aren’t out on opening night- they’re home ruining your house! Perhaps it’s your partner or spouse (and here I really mean husband) who made a mess and forgot that you don’t have maids and servants on a twenty-four hour schedule. Tired of watching your family ruin your furnishings? Don’t despair- you need not resort to plastic slip covers. Just decorate with your slob(s) in mind to save your home and your sanity:

  1. Keep Wite-Out on hand at all times. It may be obsolete for correcting typos, but it’s a miracle when it comes to camouflaging dings and scuff marks wherever you have white trim around your house- like door frames, baseboard molding or chair rails.


  2. Think your family belongs in an institution? Then cover your walls with institutional paint! Use what the builders choose for dormitories, gymnasiums, locker rooms, hospitals and cafeterias. These acrylic-based paints are specially formulated to give a thick, consistent coverage with greater durability than home use paints. And because they are made for closed spaces, they have no unpleasant odor when painting indoors.


  3. Laminate your most heavily used dining chairs, if most of your slob’s dinner is left on his chair. Almost any fabric can be laminated, just ask your fabric store or decorator where to send it. New flat finish laminations provide an invisible, moisture and stain proof barrier on fabric, making it virtually indestructible and inconspicuous too.


  4. Not into coasters? Neither am I. Protect wood finishes from wet glasses, hot cups and scratching with clear glass tops made to fit your table tops. Sure, you’ll have to wipe them, but you’ll protect what’s underneath from everything your slobs may put on top.

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